Thursday, August 22, 2013

Becoming a mother

Motherhood are some one special.
It is always said When you became a mother you will understand.
Now its true...it changes your life.
The hardship of era ini goes to the child's future.
I have always loved children and want to work with them.
Having my own from the day I conceived I couldn't wait to meet my lilone.
He is our joy and definitely some one i look forward to seeing each day.
I want to setup a playschool for toddlers and also some where babies can be placed not only to eat and sleep but also where They would be entertained.
Every child deserves be treated with excitement and joy.
With the help of an old time friend,this seems more possible.
She graduated from London in early childhood education and runs childcare plus kindergarten in Johor Bahru. 20 over tears of experience is great knowledge earn.
Hopefully this plan in Muar would be commencing soon.
I want to work on This Even more with the existence of my #lilbub

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

37 weeks with all the baggage

I would say my pregnancy is pretty smooth.
Although there was some complications in the first 3months,
But I m so stress being home.
To stay home n face my grandparents everyday,
1forgets and has weak legs,
The other is pure irritating and ignorant.
I want to have. Normal life where I can speak to my parents normally without their attention half way onto my grandfather.
Both of them are busy,so busy and still have to attend to all other things..
I may sound selfish but wasting and seeing our life pass by doing nothing?
So I guess doesn't mean that people who have everything are always contented or happy?
Expecting my child soon and I just feel so exhausted but if I do not help to lookout,
My parents will...I can't stay with my husband because he is always on the run,
Sad huh?
I guess I choose this way and life, but everytime we meet I feel really happy like nothing matters anymore and even my baby jumps n kicks with excitement.
So much in my head yet it's inappropriate to express everything here,
Shall keep it and find a way to let it go..
God please guide me to being a better granddaughter ,daughter and even a wife.
I don't know what to do, I do not want to let this feeling harm my lil one.

Sunday, March 31, 2013

What lies beneath

A life one goes through is unpredictable, there's no such things as a perfect person...
As nice a person can be there ought to be someone that person annoys.
People change for the better, I do not believe in an overnight change nor believe in changing due to what people say, unless of course it's relevant.
This past months wasn't easy for me especially,so much in my head.
Husband being far away, it's sad.
Thank god I have my family and to be living in a comfortable home.
However I don't think I live a normal life, grandparents lives with us.
It was full on attention once again since the maid left..
 If I ignore then my own mother would have to take the burden full on..
But sometimes I just come to a stage,don't care,go to bed.
Why is it seem so hard? Grandpa with dementia, hopefully grandmother will be better n play along.
I know I will work hard to have my own place to live one day,
How I wish husband has more time for me..
I feel lonely at times and don't know who to talk to.
Parents are there but it's so different.
I hope to give my child the best...
And some peace hopefully,
Allah please be with me and guide me in everything I do.
I want to do it well for my husband,child and family.